Merry Christmas!

"Hail Emmanuel (God with us), Prince of Peace and King of Kings! Praise the LORD for coming to earth as a baby, humble, showing His gentle Love for all who welcome Him into their hearts. The Light has come into the darkness and the darkness has not overcome it! Merry Christmas, everyone!" ~ Laura Hannesson (Facebook Status)

Christmas is a very secularized holiday.  Personally, I don't mind the majority of the secularized holiday.  I love eating great food and giving/receiving presents (I won't try to hide my selfish love of getting lots of presents to unwrap!).  Even Santa has it's/his benefits.  He stands as a symbol to the world of the generous, selfless nature of giving.  He reminds us of--allow me to be cheesy for a moment--the spirit of Christmas.  (For all you cynics out there, if you can't see the beautiful spirit of Christmas, read "A Christmas Carol" and put yourself in Scrooge's place.  Then tell me there is no spirit.)

With all this secularization, Christmas has become a lesser holiday in the Church.  Some people say that we shouldn't celebrate it and others say that it should only be acknowledged on December 25.  My question to this thought is this: Why?  Why does Christmas get so tainted by the world that we Christians are willing to diminish the incarnation of our Saviour?

This all hit me yesterday when my 94-year-old grandma prayed over our dinner.  She thanked Jesus for sacrificing for us when He came to earth.  How often do we think of the Christian Christmas this way?  Paul says:

Have this mind among yourselves, which is yours in Christ Jesus, who, though He was in the form of God, did not count equality with God a thing to be grasped, but emptied Himself, by taking the form of a servant, being born in the likeness of men. And being found in human form, He humbled himself by becoming obedient to the point of death,even death on a cross.

~ Philippians 2:5-8

Jesus chose to give up His right to be sitting at the right hand of God the Father and came down to earth as a baby.  He put Himself in a position where He could do nothing for Himself.  The Creator of the universe is now at the mercy of His creation.   Bathing and feeding, activities in which He never previously had need to participate, now become habitual and governed by the will of His parents.  He now submits Himself to the limitations the fall has put on our bodies.

Without the incarnation, there would have been no child-Jesus teaching the Pharisees, no miraculous life of Christ, no temptation in the desert, no kangaroo-court trial, no crucifixion, no resurrection.  No salvation.  His sacrifice didn't come so late as the death of Christ, it came the moment He was born.  The moment He entered this world, emptying Himself, and becoming the least of the people.  To minimize the importance of His birth is to minimize the humility of Jesus throughout His entire life.  Every moment of His life is characterized by servant-hood.  From moment number one.

We should be celebrating Christmas all year round, just like we do Easter.  We need to remember how amazing His birth is all year round.  God considered it significant, so what right do we have to minimize it.  I'm not saying we should sing Christmas carols all year or study the Christmas story constantly (although, there should probably be more study on this subject), but I am saying that we should talk about it a little more and consider it with more reverence.  It is, after all, a Holy day we are remembering and we should treat it as such.

The gifts, feast, and traditions of secular Christmas are so much more wonderful when we remember Christmas with this reverence.  The freedom we have with Christ allows us to experience joy like never before.  We can give presents, eat tons of food, and participate in traditions with joy because our Saviour became human for us.  This celebration of life would be so empty if Jesus never came to earth.

Why not participate in this tradition?   Why not enjoy every moment of it?  After all, life after death is going to characterized by the purest celebration of life possible.  Why can't we start now?

My excuse? I'm dating God

I recently read a Facebook status of a friend of mine inquiring about the positive aspect of being single.  I am, I believe, very well versed in this topic as I have gone my entire life being single and have no "prospects" (so to speak) at the moment.  My grandmother stopped asking me if there were any "special friends" in my life (imagine a 93 year-old woman asking this) a few years ago and friends have stopped assuming anything about my relationship status other than single.  But, for me, I would never say I'm dating God or wanting to focus on Him instead of a relationship.

Disclaimer: Before you read on or get angry and close my blog, please understand that I have no problem whatsoever with someone "dating" God or saying that they want to focus on Him and not a human relationship.  In fact, I have advised many people to adopt this mindset.  A lot of people become dating/relationship addicts and need to feel what a close relationship with God is like.  If they "date" God they can treat their relationship with Him like they do a relationship with someone of the opposite gender.  Or, if someone has just got out of a relationship, it's usually best to take time away from dating and really focus healing from the relationship before jumping back into the dating pool.

But not everyone falls under these categories and most of us who are single just lament the fact that we are single.  And, let's face it, singleness is not usually painted in a favorable light.  People who are single are portrayed as either (A) on the look-out for the next great guy/girl/man/woman or (B) bitter and career-focused, not willing to compromise on anything and really, deep down, unhappy with life.  Yet I can guarantee you that, out of everyone who reads this blog, they will not all fall in these two descriptions.

I don't fall under either of these descriptions.  Yes, I'm focused on my career, but not so much that people take the back seat.  Actually, I've chosen a job that encourages me to make sure people are prioritized.  And I'm not on the lookout for the next great man.  Sure, I keep my eyes open, but I don't think "Could this be the one?" every time I meet a random guy.  That's absurd!  Not to mention draining and terrible for friendships.  And, if pop culture and "He's Just Not That Into You" has taught me anything, it's that the guy will make it happen and I just need to chill out.  (My only thought on this is to the gentlemen: Make it happen if you want something to happen.  Thanks.)

Now, as a happily single person, I think there are a lot of positive things about being single.  YET, if I truly love whoever I'm dating (and, yes, this is probably later in the relationship), these positives will pale in comparison to everything positive about being in a relationship.  But for now I choose to focus on the great freedom in my life to do whatever I want whenever I want at no inconvenience or disrespect to others.  All the other "positive" stuff really is just using singleness as an excuse to treat our bodies as less then temples (see 1 Corinthians 6:19).

The positive that most Christians raise is that, while single, we are able to really focus our heart, soul, and mind on God and obey His will.  This, I am happy to say, is false.  In actuality, it is based on the misinterpretation and mis-contextualization of Scripture.  Most people direct us to 1 Corinthians 7 where Paul instructs the people of Corinth in the ways of marriage and non-marriage.

Now concerning the matters about which you wrote: "It is good for a man not to have sexual relations with a woman." But because of the temptation to sexual immorality, each man should have his own wife and each woman her own husband. The husband should give to his wife her conjugal rights, and likewise the wife to her husband....

Now as a concession, not a command, I say this. I wish that all were as I myself am. But each has his own gift from God, one of one kind and one of another. 

To the unmarried and the widows I say that it is good for them to remain single as I am. But if they cannot exercise self-control, they should marry. For it is better to marry than to burn with passion.

~ 1 Corinthians 7:1-3; 6-9

In an initial reading of this passage, it seems that Paul is instructing people to marry only if they can't control themselves.  But we have to understand who was reading the letter.

The city of Corinth was a central hub of their world.  Almost every person had a reason to go to Corinth at some point in their life, weather it be for tourism or for work as it was one of the main ports between the Saronic Gulf and Corinthian Gulf.  It's kind of on the same level as Paris, New York, and L.A. today.  This brought people with varying traditions and lifestyles to the city.  Corinth also had the temple of Aphrodite, the goddess of love, which housed over 1,000 cult prostitutes who sold themselves in the name of religion.  The people in the Corinthian church had lived in this culture for years before hearing the Gospel and dedicating their life to Jesus.

The new Christians had also been under intense persecution from the Jewish people.  Those who converted from Judaism had to deal with old friends and maybe even family members disowning them and/or publicly ridiculing them.  They were even banned from the synagogue, a place of worship and rest. The Gentile Christians were despised and rejected along with their fellow Jewish-Christian brothers and sister, but were also dealing with the temptations of their former life.  With all the convenience of sin at their finger tips, they were tortured with temptations by just walking down the street and probably also by their friends and family.

Also, with the wide variety of backgrounds represented in the Church, there were bound to be disagreements on the interpretation of Scripture.  Paul addresses this throughout the letter, speaking to everyone at one point or another in the letter.  One of the biggest subjects was that of sexual immorality.

Now understanding this brief background of the people of Corinth, re-read the above excerpt from 1 Corinthians 7 (or read the whole chapter).

Whenever someone lives in a lifestyle of sin for a long time, it is usually advisable for that person to completely avoid that act, whether or not the act in-and-of-itself is sinful.  For instance, an alcoholic should not even tempt themselves by walking into a liquor store or serving alcoholic beverages to anyone.  To the best of their ability, their life should remain dry.  It's not that drinking alcohol is necessarily wrong.  The addiction to and abuse of the substance is wrong.  Paul is advising these people in a similar manner: if possible, the sex addicts should refrain from sex unless they cannot gain control.  In this case, they should definitely get married so as not to sin.

Now, Paul does not say here (or anywhere, for that matter) that marriage is bad.  He is saying that, because of their social situation, they should avoid marriage because it will give them more trouble than good.  Marriage is not just something to keep people from sinning.  God created the partnership between a man and a woman because it was not good for man to be alone (Genesis 2:18).  At this moment, God created marriage.  And, since God's solution to the problem of man's loneliness was marriage,  then marriage is good.  We must also remember that God created this sacrament before sin had entered the world.  Marriage was uncontaminated and perfect.  God did not create it to keep Adam from sinning, but to make his life good.

When Paul says that he has been blessed with the gift of celibacy (a rare gift of control over sexual urgings) and wants others to have the same, he is merely saying that he wishes more people were blessed with this gift.  Considering the social environment in which the people reading this letter were immersed, it make sense that it would boost the church if more people weren't even tempted by the prominent sin.  But unfortunately that was not the case. Paul is not saying that it is wrong for them not to be blessed with that gift, but is merely wishing for something.

Saying that marriage is a sin and that the gift of celibacy is necessary for all Christians is the same as saying that all people should have the gift of preaching or leadership.  Paul clearly had those, but he never says that everyone should be a preacher or leader.  In fact, Paul recognizes the beauty found in the diversity in the church.  Later in 1 Corinthians, Paul describes the church as a body and highlights the effectiveness of the many parts.  He says:

For the body does not consist of one member but of many...If the whole body were an eye, where would be the sense of hearing?  If the whole body were an ear, where would be the sense of smell?  But as it is, God arranged the members in the body, each one of them as He chose.  If all were a single member, where would the body be?  As it is, there are many parts, yet one body. (1 Corinthians 12:14, 17-20; emphasis added)

If this is not a public declaration of the need of varied gifts, I don't know what is.  He concludes this thought reminding the church that, no matter what, every gift needs to be seasoned with love.  Gifts are nothing without love, whether it be celibacy or not.

Just one more point and I will be done.

For those who believe that we can focus more on God while single than while we're in a relationship, wake up.  We are supposed to make everything in our life be about loving God and serving Him better.  By participating in marriage we are doing something that should reveal to us something more about God.  He has left His fingerprints all over creation (Romans 1:20).  Therefore, His fingerprints are on marriage.  If someone you are dating distracts you from God, then you shouldn't be with them.  Any relationship, whether romantic or not, should direct our attention to God, not take our focus away.

That's what I have to say on the subject.  Any thoughts?

Forgiveness

Without being forgiven, released from the consequences of what we have done, our capacity to act would, as it were, be confined to a single deed from which we could never recover; we would remain the victims of its consequences forever, not unlike the sorcerer’s apprentice, who lacked the magic formula to break the spell.
(Hannah Arendt)

If one by one we counted people out
For the least sin, it wouldn't take us long
To get so we had no one left to live with.
For to be social is to be forgiving.
(Robert Frost)

The concept of forgiveness frustrates me.  Not the actual act of forgiveness nor receiving forgiveness, but lifestyle required by the choice of forgiveness.  It's not as easy as the first act of forgiveness feels, and some say the first step is the hardest.  And, if I'm really being honest, I guess I'm not frustrated with the lifestyle as much as I'm frustrated with the fact that it's a daily choice I'm so tempted not to make.
After years and years of anger, pain, and some healing, I was--for probably the millionth time--challenged to forgive someone who had caused the majority of pain in my life.  It started as an intellectual choice which I made after struggling with my pain.  I knew that it was getting in the way of my relationship with Jesus and He was calling me to do it at that moment.  So I told Him that I forgave this person.  And then a weight was lifted and my heart felt lighter.  I didn't even realize it was heavy.

For the first time I realized that I was holding this person responsible for the sins that even God wouldn't.  I held on to my anger because it made me feel justified in my pain, but this act unwittingly slapped the sacrificial act of Jesus in the face.  His death covered all sins.  All of them.  My sins; the world's sins; the sins of the past and the future; my sins that hurt others; others' sins that hurt me.  They are all covered.

But Jesus doesn't just tell us to forgive others over and over and over again, He tells Peter this in Matthew 18:22 with a sense of finality and closure.  The Greek word for "said" or "answered" originally comes from the statement "I lay down to rest" and become the word that held the connotation of laying an argument to rest. (www.biblos.com)  Jesus pulls out His authority on this one with a gentle statement similar to a parent's "We aren't having this conversation again.  This is final."

Jesus follows this with the story about the king and the servant.  The servant (me) begs the kind (God) for more time to pay off his debt (sin).  The king graciously forgave the debt completely and sent the servant on his way. The servant then held another man responsible for a debt owed the servant and put the man in prison until he could pay the debt.  When the king heard this, he threw the servant in jail until he could pay the debt. (Matthew 18:21-35)

Then Jesus says: 

So also my heavenly Father will do to every one of you, if you do not forgive your brother from your heart. (Matthew 18:35)

Oof.  That's one to the gut.

The Greek word for heart here is kardiōn which refers to "our 'desire-decisions' that establish who we really are." (www.biblos.com)  We must forgive from the deepest part of our being.  Sorry, moms and dads of the world, but all those apologies you forced us to make when we were children, they weren't apologies.  We knew it then, but it carries so much more weight for us now that we know it doesn't count.

But why can't it stick the first time?  I know that we are sinful and the heart is desperately wicked, but the struggle between my love for God and my love for self seems so real when the idea of forgiveness presents itself.  It seems like all the triumphs (e.g. the act of forgiveness) is only momentary.

Forgiveness is not just a daily choice, it's an hourly--sometimes minute-by-minute--choice.  And we have no excuse of being too tired or drained from the pain.  If God can do it every single moment with trillions of people, then I should be able to do it with the few people in my life.  We are made in His image after all.
I guess it's just so darn annoying that it's so hard and constant.  I know it's like every other habit and you have to do it over and over again until you finally get it, but this one comes with so much more weight.  It comes with wading through the pain and seeing it for what it really is (our fallen humanity).  Yet it also comes with so much more freedom than any other habit can.  We are released not only from anger and pain, but from our own insecurities which prevent us from trusting Jesus to heal the wounds.

I guess it all comes to down to who you trust more: yourself or Jesus.